Since 1996, two SIUE students have been murdered in Cougar Village at the hands of their partners. Though both men and women experience domestic violence, norms of masculinity and men's physical stature make domestic violence an issue that tends to harm women more. However, it is important to note that men are sometimes shamed into not reporting their experiences with domestic violence because they are supposed to take it "like a man."
There are wonderful organizations for both victims and abusers of domestic violence. Raven tries to teach non-violent conflict resolution skills, mainly to men. Domestic violence shelters, geared towards women, can provide a short-term safe place. Safe Connections, in St. Louis, provides a 24 hour hot-line and counseling for survivors of violence: domestic violence, childhood abuse, rape and sexual assault.
Both men and women, gay and straight, need to know that there are others who have successfully fought back and escaped their situations.