While you were sleeping (in class) |
Ron Norton |
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LEXINGTON, Ky. (U-WIRE) - Almost everybody does it. Just ask your teachers. They did it when they were your age. Sleeping in class is an epidemic in some early classes involving things from cellular mitosis to ceramic design. Here are some strategies for trying to count the sheep in class. Two-handed forehead grip: Lean forward with elbows on desk, forming a triangle with forearms and table to brace your head, looking straight down. Act as if you are reading your book or notes. Downfall: possible slippage of forehead. Result: bloody nose, whiplash at best. One-hand chin lift: One arm is free to move pen in hand to add to the illusion of being awake. The other is to cautiously brace your chin like a food tray during landing, in an upright and hopefully locked position. Downfall: uncontrollable swaying form side to side. Result: wrist fatigue similar to that of holding a watermelon in hand for hours at a time. Left-arm-rest-and-still-writing technique: Reversed for lefties, place left arm on desk with forearm parallel to front desk edge and right angle to rest of arm. Place head in this nook, facing an open notebook. Move pen back and forth across page, simulating intrigued note taking. Downfall: dropping pen and drooling. Result: ultimately embarrassed about drool stains that you later try to play off as condensation from a beer. Reclined head bob: Can only be accomplished in some classrooms. Recline as if in a La-Z-Boy recliner and act intrigued by the lecture. Works best if you can balance your head in your sleep. Downfall: infamous head bob that you laugh at when others do it. Result: reddening of face and possibly more neck fatigue than Atlas. Stay-at-home rollover: Uh, self-explanatory. Roll over. Turn off alarm after hitting snooze button eight times. Go back to sleep. Downfall: missing class, the lecture and the eye candy in the third row. Result: depending on the class, either failing a quiz, test or the class itself.... | |